Friday, March 28, 2008

More Adventures From The Grocery Store Checkout Line

As most of you have heard, The Fred likes to chat up the cashiers at the grocery store. If I gave her the opportunity, she would divulge her entire life story...and mine...and everyone else's. I don't fault her for being social, but she has yet to develop her understanding that some things should not be shared with complete strangers. Although, after The Fred gets done with them, we can hardly call them strangers anymore.

Several months ago, I had to get two crowns at my dental appointment. Since my FIL is my dentist, he suggested that I get gold crowns since they would hold up longer than porcelain. At his recommendation, I decided that would be the best choice since the crowns are only on my back lower teeth where no one can see them. After my appointment, I showed them to The Fred. This was my first mistake...

While in the grocery store checkout line several days later, The Fred noticed that the cashier had her two front teeth framed in gold. Without skipping a beat, The Fred looked at me and said, "Hey, Momma! Show her your gold teeth!" My jaw almost hit the floor...I was speechless...literally. The cashier just looked at me, as if to say, "I know that this white girl does not have any gold teeth." This was our first adventure in the checkout line at the grocery store.

Well, while we were at the grocery store the other day, the cashier was chatting with The Fred about what she had gotten in her Easter basket. At some point, The Fred told her that her favorite color was pink. She told the cashier that her sheets were pink and her shirt was pink.

The cashier, trying to keep up the conversation, said, "What else is pink?"
The Fred said, "My pink lipstick."
The cashier said, "What else is pink?"
The Fred thought for a moment, and then she said, "Momma's boobies."

WHAT!? All that I could do was pretend that I didn't hear her.

Do they make muzzles in her size? Gotta love her!

4 comments:

Poodlehead said...

that is LOL funny! Are your boobies pink? ha!

Anonymous said...

Gotta love The Fred!!!! I thought she was going to say your panties without the back (!!!!) were pink!

TS said...

Oh, I forgot to tell you that last night, she ran from one end of the restaurant to the other, shouting happily, "I teeteed in the potty!!"

Kim said...

i just love the fred. now that is some good stuff!