For those of you Yankees, this is nothing to get excited about, but we had the privilege of enjoying a snow day on Saturday. I promise...every little bit counts with kids. The Fred had a blast making snowballs, and StickyBun-Scotti couldn't stop giggling while the snowflakes were landing on his face!
For financial aid purposes, I had to find an elective class to take that would give me full-time status as a student. After thumbing through all of the classes given by the Physical Education Department and some advice from Kimtastic Momma, I decided that if I was going to have to spend time taking another class, I was going to take something fun that I could use in my everyday life. I happened upon a class called "Advanced Digital Photographic Manipulation" that is given by the Art Department. The description for the class stated that this class would focus on taking digital photographs and applying advanced Photoshop techniques to these images. Based on my background, I figured that this would be the perfect class for me.
All I can say is...wow! I know that it will make BlueMomma happy to know that I am learning soooo much. Our instructor has asked us to begin taking as many photos as possible in RAW format to use for the class. Over the past week, I have taken hundreds of pictures...trying to avoid pics of the kids and focusing on things that I find beautiful (i.e. water, flowers, butterflies, trees, vintage signage, etc.)
Today, our instructor told us that he would like to view our images. I was excited because I had taken hundreds of pics. One problem, he hated them...all of them. Since he is an incredibly talented artist/photographer, I should have known that I needed some pics that were a little bit deeper. His first question was, "What are you trying to say?" His second question was, "Why would I want to look at your pictures?" Well, poo! So, right now, I am trying to figure out what statement I want to make...sheesh! Until then, enjoy the pretty pics. They say nothing except, "I took this picture because I wanted to, and I thought that it was pretty."
Pictures That Don't Say Anything
Thought I would share some pics from StickyBun-Scotti's 1st Birthday Party! We decided to just have a small family gathering at our house for his party. Not sure if we could have fit many more in our living room, so we may have to select a different venue for when we invite all of his pals.
This will come as no surprise to most, but I am what most would refer to as a "people-pleaser." I'm not sure where this all began, but it is definitely a full-fledged trait at this point. Call it the Libra mentality or avoiding conflict or whatever, but I like to please people, and I have been damn good at it until now. I want to be happy...and I want everyone else to be happy...so if I can help to make you happy in some way, I am going to try. I have found that this can be a great thing when it comes to parenting, but it is not always good in our other personal relationships. Why? Because some people just can't be pleased. Sometimes that proverbial bar just isn't within reach because it never existed in the first place.
I'm sure most of you are wondering where the loss of identity comes into play, so here we go. Could we really spend so much time and effort trying to please somebody that we lose a part of ourselves in the process? For example, let's just say, you don't like chicken, don't like to drive, only like to go out to lunch on Friday, and love country music. Based on this knowledge, I will not cook chicken when you come over, drive whenever we are together, only ask you to lunch on Friday, and let you tune the radio to a country station...even though I dislike country music for the most part. Can you see where the loss of identity part factors into this equation? Because of my strong desire to please others, I begin to lose some of the things that make me...well, me.
Now, let's take this one step further. You have let me know in some way these aforementioned wants, desires, likes, and dislikes, so I have remembered these things in a type of mental checklist. Without notice, things change and items are added to and erased from the list. With the longer our relationship lasts, my mental checklist begins to include hundreds if not thousands of items. There are so many items at this point that I go through my day trying my best to make sure I do these things in the way that you like. Unfortunately, I fail...often. The people-pleaser in me gets very hurt because I don't want you to be unhappy, but it never seems that I can do things in a way that you would deem correct.
So, I go through life trying to do things according to my mental checklist, but realize in the process that I am very rarely doing things the way that I would choose to do them. Not only that, but I begin to voice my opinion less and am fearful of speaking what is on my mind...even when you ask me, "what is wrong?" This is the loss of identity that comes from just too much people pleasing. I have to finally admit to myself that some people cannot be pleased...no matter how hard we try, and some people will never be happy...and there is nothing we can do about it. Although, maybe some good drugs could help.
Whew! That was deep...I know. Feels good to let it all out.
This is my 100th post, and I am going to keep it short and sweet...
"There are only two good things to do on a day like today...and I don't play cards."
To say that things have been hectic, would be the understatement of the century. I have been receiving e-mails en masse (some from people I don't even know besides via my blog) asking if I am okay since I have not posted since mid-December. Everything is fine...just crazy as usual. I just started school on Monday at UAB. Here are some things I have realized since my return to school:
...we all acted like idiots when we were college freshmen
...you get smarter with age
...you appreciate time with your kids even more when you don't see them 24/7
...cafeteria food has gotten much better over the past ten years
...always look both ways...college kids don't see you or the red light when driving and talking on the phone
I know...there is nothing prophetic about these statements...just some observations. Once I get this first week under my belt, and my laptop back up and running, I will be resuming my regular posting...erratic as it may be. Until next time, Happy 2008!
