Cancer...Really?

I must say that I was really holding out hope for a miracle.  You know how you sometimes have that gut feeling that something just isn't right?  In nursing, we are taught to always act when our gut tells us that something "just isn't right."  My gut has been telling me this for a while now...just a different feeling that I have had over the past few weeks...nothing ominous...just a little bit different from the norm.

The first surgery, on Monday, went very well.  They removed the right side of my thyroid, the tumor, and 2 lymph nodes.  Thank God for excellent nurses!  I am also very thankful for my CRNA that was kind enough to whip some good drugs out of his pocket (funny how they always just have this stuff in their pockets...anyone that has had surgery or works in healthcare knows what I am talking about) to calm my fears (and my stomach).  I am eternally grateful.  After surgery, I was comfortable enough to go home and get in my bed. There is something about being in your own bed that has a healing effect.  My cold, dark room is like my own personal wellness retreat.

I was scheduled for my follow-up appointment on Thursday morning.  Husby went with me to see Dr. Best, and after checking out my Texas Chainsaw massacre incision (just in time for Halloween, might I add) and taking a look at my vocal chords, Dr. Best got that look on his face.  You know the look....the "OMG, I really don't want to tell you the bad news" look.  The news was to let us know that the cancer diagnosis was confirmed and the tumor was a follicular variant papillary carcinoma with extension and lymph node metastasis.  The other news was to let m know that I would need to have completion surgery on Monday...same time, same place.

They went ahead and did staging, so the cancer is T3N1a follicular variant papillary carcinoma, which is Stage III.  Because I am under 45 years old, they usually like to stage better than they would for someone over 45 years old, so for age reasons, they can call me Stage I or II.  After the second surgery, I will have a few weeks before I start treatment to prep my body for the radioactive iodine treatment.  

As D-Daddy would say, "Are we having fun yet?"  Really, I am okay.  I know that is hard to believe, but I am.  I just want my family to be okay.  I am trying to keep as much normalcy in our lives as I can, and with the help of friends and family, that has been possible.  I am still optimistic, and I know that I will be okay.  Thank you to everyone for all of the food, prayers, and kind words...you all mean more to me than you know.  

Until next time...I love you!

xoxoxox

-K